Sunday, March 30, 2014

Where is Crimea's Moses? Where are the Seven Plagues? Why is God Letting This Happen? Is he on vacation again?

When Moses said to the Egyptian King, "Let my people Go!" The king refused his request. When Ukraine's newly self-appointed President said to Vladimir Putin, Let my People (in Crimea) Go!"  Self-appointed King for Life Vladimir refused to honor his request.

The Bible says that God sent down 7 plagues upon Russia, I mean Egypt! Here are the 7 plagues that I would want God to send upon Russia:

1. All of the oil would dry up.
2. The natural gas pipelines would mysteriously be blown up.
3. Vladimir Putin would get testicular cancer (incurable stage).
4. Russia's provinces and territories would split up into individual countries.
5. The ruble would decline in value to one cent US currency.
6. A million people would descend on Moscow and overthrow the corrupt oligarchy and string up members of the oligarchy, parliament, the communist party, and clean house throughout the entire nation.
7. Every child named Vladimir would die and it would be treason to give your child that name.
8. Every homosexual/lesbian/LGBT person in the world would descend upon Russia and would take over Siberia and freeze to death.
9. The naval fleets of the world would blockade all shipments into and out of Russia.
10. Every Russian man would have to marry their mother-in-law and kiss their feet every morning and night for the rest of their lives. If they are single, they have to marry one of their fat aunts.
11.  And because this is the 21st century, an 11th plague should be visited upon Russia until it allows every citizen the "natural rights of man" as described by John Locke and Thomas Jefferson as

According to Locke there are three natural rights:
  • Life: everyone is entitled to live once they are created.
  • Liberty: everyone is entitled to do anything they want to so long as it doesn't conflict with the first right.
  • Estate: everyone is entitled to own all they create or gain through gift or trade so long as it doesn't conflict with the first two rights.
This is not allowed to happen in Russia.Until God intervenes and visits these plagues upon Russia, there will be no peace throughout the world, or at least until Vladimir Putin is assassinated- oops! Did I write that?

12. And to make the plagues and even number we could send Michelle Obama and her massive wasteful entourage to sponge off of Vladimir Putin and live in his presidential palace scrubbing floors and cleaning rooms for six months (he would have committed suicide by then just to get away from her). Of course, Michelle and her guests would be paid the same wage as an average Russian makes per day (the United States would not have to support her wasteful spending habits) and maybe we could pay off some of her husband's budget deficits if she was off of the payroll. Talk about a plague upon the people!

If the United States allows a mixed race liberal couple back into the White House again, it will be the moral and economic end to the United States. The New Rome will collapse!

Well, as one of the most tolerant, honest men in the world, I do believe that the life of Russia as a country is coming near to its end. And no, Putin is not Satan - even though he does not yet believe in God- he will by this time next year.

If Russia invades Ukraine- it will be the end of Russia period. Russia will then be carved up into more countries. Putin, if he is still alive, will be imprisoned for life next to Bashar Hafez al-Assad, the Insane President of Syria who has murdered millions of his own people and made immigrants of millions more. They will die alone in their own prison cells with an unopened Bible on the only table in the room.

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